Grin and Bare It

Divas we got to great lengths to ensure that we look just the way that we want to look when we are going out. Even if you don't consider yourself a diva most people in general want to look a certain way when they are going out. Whether you are going to a club, out to dinner, or even to a movie, most people want to look a certain way.

It is very un-diva-like to be out in a club and take off your wig/shoes. You lose a ton of diva points for this buffockery!!!

The shoes you choose to wear are a choice. All shoes aren't for all occasions and those of us who have a special love affair with shoes know that there are some shoes that you only wear when you aren't going to be on your feet for long periods of time. It is so tacky to take your shoes off in the club. Divas even if your shoes are killing you, get somewhere and sit it on down and keep looking cute. You have to know that if that is a choice that you made then you should just "Grin and Bare It" if you failed to throw a "plan b" in your bag or in your car.

Please don't wear a wig if you know that you like to dance hard and sweat a great deal. I was out and about this past weekend with the ladies from my book club and there was a lady there who had on a really cute wig and yes she was getting it in on the dance floor. After we had been there about an hour we noticed that she had transformed...yes this chick had taken her wig off and it was on the floor by the pole. Now this was a violation of the worse kind and she is banished from divadom forever for this buffockery!!

Life: Everything in our lives won't always be what makes us happy. Sometimes we have to make some hard to deal with choices for the greater good and even though we are screaming, kicking, and crying inside we have to just "Grin and Bare It"!!

Put on Your Happy Face

Your smile is one of your most valuable assets divas!! It makes you more approachable and warms people's overall perception of you. For you divas who wear foundation it is super important that you make sure to blend well. It is detrimental to your diva status to have a visible line around your face where your makeup ends. You CAN NOT be a diva if your face is painted on and the canvas is visible!! Please, please, please blend beyond your jaw line and chin area.

Life: Everyone must learn to not let the world know everything that's going on in your life. If you are going through some things it's not for everyone to know. If you are in prayer about something then there is no need to wear a worry sign all over your face. Put on Your Happy Face and look like what ever you have been praying about is already done.

Stay Ready

A true certified Diva stays ready!! She carries herself in such a way that she can leave the office and head straight to happy hour and get her sexy twirl on without being worried about her look. She can leave class and head straight to a party and still be the head turner in the room!! I can not express how important it is for Divas to Stay Ready. You never know when you will be requested to attend or accompany someone to a function spur of the moment and if you aren't ready then you could be missing out on a wonderful opportunity to share your Diva-osity with the world!!! If you don't keep your daily maintenance in order then you aren't staying ready. The little things mean so much when you are a diva!! Hair, nails, feet, eyebrows, clothing, and SHOES...these are all things that divas should keep in check without giving it much thought. It should be such a part of your being that if these things aren't in order that you feel out of place.

Example...my Florida bestie Candice (yes my bestie's name is Candice as well) keeps a pair of heels and a belt in her car just in case of emergencies. We were meeting some friends for karaoke and she had an incredibly long day at work and didn't go home afterwards, but when she stepped in the building no one knew that. She had taken her daytime look changed into a pair of peep toes and threw on a belt and owned the room when she walked in.

I make it my business to Stay Ready!! If I Stay Ready then I don't have to Get Ready!!!

Life: I was loafing around on facebook (as usual) and I came across a status that really caught my attention. The status read "If you stay ready you don't have to get ready...Suga Free". I thought to myself how awesome is that...life hits us with blows of all sizes and impacts. If we stay ready to take on the isms and schisms of life then we are much more likely to not be taken out by the blows. For we believers this translates to stay in prayer. With the power of prayer we are prepared to take on any blow that will come our way. Stay Ready Divas!!!!!

Remember being a diva is more than just a title, it's a way of life!!

Inspired by a facebook status from my cousin Author Jemayne L. King.

Photo of my bestie Candice D. and myself...divas staying ready!!!

Make It A Good One

Divas love to stand out in a crowd. We put in extra time and effort to look oh so right when we step out on the scene. This is essential in declaring your diva status. You may call yourself a diva all you wish, but if you aren't exuding diva in your appearance then who else is calling you a diva? No one.

If you are going to wear a wig or a hair weave at least make it a good one. If the bottom of your wig is matted and stiff...it's not a good one. If you can see the ENTIRE seam around the edge of your lace front...it's not a good one. If the tip of your track is poking out at your temple...it's not a good one. If you are wearing silky straight weave and your hair has a more coarse texture...try again it's not a good one. I understand that it's not the goal of everyone to pass off their weave or wig as being real but shouldn't it look a little realistic???

Life: We are all different for a very beautiful reason, variety is the spice of life and keeps life interesting. Embrace the uniqueness that makes you who you are and you just may like it more than the attempts you have made at trying to be like someone else. We only have one life to live so let's do our very best to Make It A Good One!!!

Remember being a diva is more than just a title, it's a way of life!!!

Passion + Purpose = Powerhouse

Divas we are all here for a reason and have a purpose for our diva status. I felt quite some years ago that my purpose for being a diva was to show my other plus sized divas that size has nothing to do with your diva status. There are several awesome stores that sell great fashions for the woman of size. Sometimes we have to mix and match items from different retailers but we do what we have to do.

As a diva it is a valuable asset to know what your diva purpose is. It could be to show divas that you can be fine on a dime, it could be that you show the Divas In Training (D.I.T.) that they don't have to show all of their goodies to get attention. Whatever your diva purpose may be approach it with passion and your result will be a powerhouse.

Life: We are all apt to be excited about what others think about us. What matters most is what we think about ourselves. I was having yet another conversation with a friend...(yes I have a healthy group of friends) and she was feeling a little overwhelmed. She was being pushed into a position that she knows isn't her rightful place and she doesn't feel led to be there in any way. My advice to her was this..."You know who you are and what your purpose is. When it is time for an advancement you will know, so don't let anyone push you into a wilderness that you aren't equipped for. That's like allowing someone to convince you that you can jump in the ocean knowing that you can't swim but they say that you can. In the end you have to figure out how to save yourself while they sit back and watch you struggle. You could have very well stopped it at the beginning because common sense told you that you know you can't swim girl."

Basically you know who you are and you know what your purpose is. When you combine passion with purpose the result is a powerhouse!!!

Remember being a diva is more than just a title, it's a way of life.

Inspired by my friend Rayan Moore. Love ya diva!!!

Walk It Out

Walking is an excellent way to get in some cardio and tone the legs divas. It has to by far be the easiest excercise where you can keep it cute. However, if you are going to walk wearing shorts please tame the leg mane...please. There is nothing sexy about a woman with bushy hairy legs. You are banished from the Divadom for this buffockery. It is not cute and definitely not sexy. Besides what good is toning and keeping the legs in shape if they are going to be over shadowed by all of that hair? It's kind of defeating your purpose. Shaving your legs is like keeping your house in order...a necessity for an orderly lifestyle. All divas need order in our lives to be effective in what we do. Come on divas let's just Walk It Out!!! Life: Just like too much body hair there are some bad habits that we should shave away from our lives. These habits vary and only you can really determine what they are, however shaving them away will make some aspect of your life get the attention that it deserves. Me and one of the Beautiful People in my life chose to give up carbs and walk 10-12 miles each week for two weeks. It's been awesome and we are seeing the benefits of our sacrifice. What is it that you should maybe give up to see something else more clearly in your life? What ever it may be shave it away and Walk It Out!!!! Remember being a diva is more than a title, it's a way of life!! This post was inspired by Lavinia Wishon and Anthony Sherwood. Love ya both!!!

Don't Shrink It

You know the little tag on the inside of our clothing that gives us the instructions for taking care of our clothing, let's do better with following those instructions. If your instructions say dry clean only, most of the time they mean dry clean only. If it says wash in cold water, most of the time they mean wash in cold water ONLY. These two in particular are big ones in making sure that you don't ruin the structure of your fabric or shrink your garment. It is not diva like to wear an article of clothing that has visibly shrunk and doesn't fit right anymore. You do not get the diva recognition that you deserve when you present yourself like this. I understand that with the prices of gas today that the budget for other luxuries may have to be altered, however there are a number of items in your grocery store such as dryel that can help you do your dry cleaning at home. There are also a great deal of dry cleaners offering special prices and even coupons for their services. Don't automatically assume that they are expensive, at least inquire about their prices for your garments. Make a conscious effort to do better and Don't Shrink It!!!

Life: One of my favorite inspirational quotes is Our Deepest Fear by Marianne Williamson. A portion of this work states:

"Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about your playing small so that others won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine..."

It seems that when you put in effort and work to establish yourself in life it becomes a major intimidation factor for some people. Who would have ever thought that speaking properly and enunciating your words would become an intimidation factor? Why is it an issue to take pride in your appearance? Should we be made to feel inferior because we want to be educated? These are the norm for a vast majority of us and for those who haven't reached a place of normalcy with these things but are making an effort to do so, don't lose sight of your goals because others are intimidated. Their intimidation is beyond your control. Don't Shrink It...show them that they need to be stretched!!!!

Remember being a diva is more than just a title, it's a way of life!!

This post was inspired by a conversation with my fabulous friend Anthony Sherwood!!!

Label Over Load

I love labels just as much as the next diva, but they have to be worn in moderation. I was in Orlando this past weekend and I saw someone with a Dereon top, Apple Bottom jeans, Coach shoes, Dolce and Gabbana shades, and a Gucci bag. Now this was wrong on so many levels that I instantly started to twitch when she walked past me. Her diva-tude was on point, but the rest of her needed a total overhaul. I wanted to whisk her away like on one of those quick makeover shows and auto correct her attire for the day. Divas please, please, please don't try to do to much with the labels!!! Every piece that you have on doesn't have to be designer and certainly not from all different designers. I personally don't really care for clothes with a lot of ornate writing and designs. They tend to draw attention from others who wear them and those who don't know any better. For those of us who do have an eye for great pieces this screams "BASIC"!!! Divas who have an appetite for the finer things in life don't need the name to be plastered on a piece to recognize the work of a good designer. The quality in the make of the item speaks for itself. Be careful not to find yourself in "Label Over Load", you lose a plethora of diva points for this buffockery!!!

Life: There is so much pressure today to associate yourself in some way with a label. A few years ago I met a beautiful lady online and we developed a friendship that to most wouldn't be understood. We corresponded strictly online for a couple of months and it was awesome. We could relate to one another and the exchange of conversation between the two of us was remarkable. She never placed a label on herself and it didn't matter after a while because we had formed a friendship. When we finally decided to have lunch I was totally taken aback by her appearance initially. She is a lesbian and of a more androgynous persuasion. She doesn't label herself as a stud, butch, boi, or any of the other labels. She says that she is a woman who dresses in a way that is comfortable for her and I totally respect that. She is one of the best friends I have ever had the pleasure of meeting labeless and loving her life!!!

When you allow yourself to get to know people for who they really are what difference does it make what they label themselves as? Be careful when placing labels on other people because you could be in "Label Over Load" and not even be aware. People are just that...people!!

Remember being a diva is more than just a title, it's a way of life!!!

Today's inspiration is from my wonderful forever friend!!! Love ya lady!!!

Look the Part

Divas know that one of the most important aspects of being a diva is to "look" the part. Even if you don't quite have the diva-tude to a science, you have to be visually fabulous at all times. Hair, clothes, SHOES, nails, make-up, and accessories should all be well planned and executed regularly. Granted, we all have those not so diva like days but they should be minimal to say the least. As I stated in a previous post you can not consider yourself a diva if the only time you put effort into your look is on the weekend. Instead of being a diva you would be considered simply a party girl.

There are countless ways to keep it simple and still be fabulous!! For instance my children are athletes and as a mommy it's my duty to be at their sporting events cheering them on. I know this may be a shocker but no I don't wear heels to their games. However I am still the mom to watch out for because I have several pairs of fabulous flat sandals and cute sneakers that demand attention when I walk in the room. I am always well put together and don't just show up looking like I rolled out of bed and showed up at the game. Even when in sports mommy mode I am still a diva!!! I believe we as divas have to ALWAYS "Look the Part"!!!!

I was out for the evening a few days ago with my awesome friends and one of the topics for discussion was work attire. If you have worked hard to climb the corporate ladder or even if you are just beginning your hike up that ladder you need to consider your look. If you want to be perceived as a professional and one who takes pride in what they do then I believe you should start with the way that you look. Before anyone can really get to know who you are and what you know they form their impression of you based on what they see. If you are showing up to the office in sweat pants and basketball shorts what part do you look like you play? I understand that some work environments are more relaxed than others, but does that mean you have to be totally relaxed with your personal standards as well? If your professional environment is laid back then try a simple pair of chinos and a polo shirt. There are millions of ways to keep it simple without making it "Barney" simple. The saying "Dress for Success" is paramount when you are preparing for a fabulous day in the office!!!

Life: You set the tone for the way that others will receive and perceive you!! If you want to be taken seriously then demand authoritative attention!!! You want to be well liked or even loved then love yourself and be a person that you in yourself would like!!

My friends are such an inspiration to me. This is my friend Demetrick Brown in the photo looking the part!!!